Random thoughts on life

Tags

arsenal, bus, cat, catnip, children, drunk, fabric, football, free cycle, Liverpool, screaming, sewing, toy

I may rant…

And I fully understand this is normally a blog about sewing so I also may drift off topic a little.

I am not a small man, I stand just under 6’6″ and top out at around 21stn so that’s 315lb or about 125kg so I stand out.

A lot.

So why do I turn invisible the moment I set foot outside my front door? I turn into some kind human magnet, people just walk into me, bump into me or just want to stand in the exact part of the planet I was stood on why? And it always happens that when I’m carrying something heavy or a awkward shape people decide that I am the perfect person to ask directions.

Crying children on the bus, so you get on the bus with a screaming child comfort your child do not just have a conversation on your phone whilst the said sporn of the morningstar makes me want to kill, I very much doubt you are reading this but I do hope you understand why I gave you a mouthful and as for the boyfriend muttering threats under his breath please have the balls to do it to my face.

Drunk obnoxious Liverpool fans on the bus. I timed my journey to work badly yesterday. And left home just as the Arsenal v Liverpool match finished. As I live very close to the arsenal stadium I had to struggle with 1000’s of happy gunners fans. I’m ok with that, so I get to the bus stop to be greeted by 15 – 20 drunk Liverpool fans there looking lost and getting a bit gobby. They get on the bus moaning about everything, I don’t care about bad language I use it every day but try not to in public, this wasn’t top of the scousers list. They just got worse. But from what they were saying all they wanted to do was get to Euston get some beers and go back north. I decided that to butt into their conversion would be rude and therefore couldn’t point out they were on a bus heading to London Bridge not Euston but I did as I got off just so I could see the look of panic on their face.

Was good.

The lack of fabric on free cycle I blame Kirsty Allsopp she has ruined free cycle by making a tv programme featuring it. The amount of fabric free cycle used to offer was astounding but now nothing. So thanks Kirsty.

My cat

This is the little madam, and I have to say now she is a great cat she doesn’t have a nasty bone in her body, she is just a sweet animal. But she is a mouse killer, I live in a old victorian house so there are mice and the cat catches them. Her job I suppose but she doesn’t always kill them she lets them go in the house and watches them run and hide in one of the many fabric piles where they die, nothing compares to reaching down expecting to pick up some vintage Paddington fabric and coming away with a very dead slightly chewed mouse.

And speaking of mice I make catnip mice available from my etsy shop and I own a cat so I thought a perfect product tester, I hoovered yesterday and needed to move the cats corner where her toys and the bit of fabric she wanted stay and I counted just how many catnip mice she has. 21 of them.

21! She is a small cat who is adroit at stealing and hiding the things I make she didn’t look guilty just angry at getting busted.

Have a happy easter.

Put myself out there to be shot at (figuratively)

Tags

cat, craft, crafting, crowd funding, fabric, kickstarter, kitten, project, sewing, vintage

Ok so I decided to try my crowd funding project again, last time didn’t go according to plan but it’s all hay ho pip and dandy (stolen from Red dwarf)

It’s a simple plan to get more people interested in sewing and crafting in general.

If I can make clothing that I’m allowed out of the house in anybody can.

I want to run simple sewing classes lasting no longer than a hour. Teaching people how to turn up a hem, fix a split seam, put on a button simple easy things some people just don’t learn.

I also would like to give anyone who attends a class a sewing kit and a simple pattern to make something.

The more people are crafting the better the chance of the next big thing.

I just need a little help in getting to money together.

So…

If a gibbon like me can do it anyone can.

As always I have my catnip mouse tester on standby.

Bunting hell

Tags

bfg, bunting, cat, cats, London, matilda, paddington, sewing

‘I bunt therefore I am’

Been busy over the last few weeks making bunting for a market on the south bank.

Let me tell you it’s not fun, in fact it was dull as ditch water and I’ve spent time in ditches so I know this to be true.

The actual sewing I enjoy the physical attachment of the flags to the tape is almost therapeutic but the cutting out…

I was tempted to lop off a limb, but (cliché alert) I was over the moon at the results.

And as always I had my trusty helper telling me what to do.

So if you want some bunting let me know.

My dull reminder of the year.

Tags

bunting, catnip, craft, crafting, etsy, fabric, lavender, markets, mice, pattern, shirt, waistcoat, waistcoats

Well its the end of the year so congratulations on getting this far, I don’t really know what to say so forgive my ramble.

But in the space of six months I have gone from this

To this

 

An improvement of sorts.

Lets have a recap;

 

I started out making catnip/lavender mice, and bunting it went well but I thought I could do more, so I did.

I found much to my amazement that I’m actually not that bad at sewing, so off I pop to the local fabric shop to get a sewing pattern, I picked a shrt pattern and got busy.

Its the most amount of clothing I have owned since my mother was my personal shopper.

But still I wasn’t satisfied I wanted more…

So waistcoats.

Back I shuffle to the fabric shop for another pattern and start to make my waistcoats.

 

I did ok at the local markets and even sold a few, and I have proof.

But what to do between Christmas day and new years day?

I did this.

As I have a mild Paddington obsession.

 

I have enjoyed the sewing and making things and hope in the new year to try and turn it into some kind of viable business so if you fancy lending me say £2000 for a start up I would be most happy!

If you like anything you see please visit my etsy shop

https://www.etsy.com/uk/shop/FabricFellaMakes?ref=hdr_shop_menu

I hope you have a happy new year.

 

 

The joy the rapture

Tags

catnip, crafting, etsy, mice, Ozymandias, sewing, waistcoats

I feel like Ozymandias, surveying my empire atop a tower of gold, looking down on you lesser mortals with pity.
Let the trumpets cry and make this proclamation

I SOLD SOMETHING ON ETSY

Two catnip mice.

Joy and happiness unconfined

I also made a toddler waistcoat, so if you need a small gift let me know.

My name is Ozymandias, king of kings; look on my works, ye mighty and despair!

Sulking at Christmas

This is a photo of a sad kitten.

I don’t know why it’s sad maybe it failed the mensa test.

Admittedly I’m not sure about the average IQ of a cat, but as this post isn’t about cats or IQ I shall stop wittering.

I put the sad kitten photo up because I’m sad and honestly you would rather see a sad kitten than my Shrek like face grinning at you this morning.

As much as I enjoy making the waistcoats and bunting the stress I feel in not selling one online is building, now I know that in the grand scheme of things selling something on etsy or ebay is not up there with ending world hunger or working out a way to keep made in Chelsea off TV (never seen it and hopefully never will) but it’s still stressing me out.

Moan over.

I’ve spent the last few hours making this.

About as christmas as you can get from a man who when December the first comes around just wants to hide until the false jollity and good will to all has passed and I can go back to being a miserable so and so.

I’m good at miserable.

Very good.

Ask people and they will say oh FabricFella he is miserable.

As a smalll sidebar I was told last week that a artesian bakery is selling bread for £5 a loaf A FIVER! unless it’s made from unicorn piss and gold dust where a fiver might be acceptable…

Sidebar over.

I’ve also been making Christmas bunting.

So please read re tweet and re blog.

Have a happy Christmas and a great new year.

I’ve become obsessed with making waistcoats

Been a while.

Sorry.

But in mitigation I’ve been busy.

So…

Shirts;

I own two shirts, a pink long sleeve and a white short sleeved, and that is all I need, I’m not really a shirt kind of man, it’s been pointed out I have the dress sense of a tramp.

A tramp I ask you

Ok fair enough.

So I trotted down to the fabric shop to choose my pattern.

And I made this, it’s ok but a little bland.

But I persevered and made this, I rather like it.

But still a little understated.

This isn’t.

And I thought hmmm I like that so back I toddle to the fabric shop for a new pattern.

I like but again pink ikea flamingos come to my rescue.

Now this I like.

So much so that I made this.

That brings me on to waistcoats,

I have my two I’ve already made for myself.

And

But I have made a few to sell. Not all finished yet but…

I would like to sell one soon.

This was going to be mine but the pattern shrank, nothing to do with me maybe gaining a bit of weight.

Gutted about that but my loss is someone’s gain.

I made a few for nippers, and the rest for adults.

I branched out and made a tie, the most complicated thing I have attempted since my physics dissertation.

Three months ago I could use a sewing machine but never thought I could make clothing, all of it is good enough to sell and it’s so simple, yes complicated at first but so was driving or the first weeks of being a parent. You’re clueless until you are shown what to do and practised a few times.

I am thinking of translating the patterns I have into a idiot step by step guide with photos words that don’t need the OED to translate and simple tips.

But apathy and such so don’t hold your breath.

I urge you all to pick up a sewing machine and pattern and try it, if a clueless, witless buffoon like me can do it anyone can.

I know the items I make are to my personal taste but if anyone wants something please ask and if you inexplicably see something you like for the love of god tell me.

But if i sell nothing its a really nice feeling to make something tangible.

Success (of sorts)

Tags

etsy, fabric, pattern, sewing, shirt, waistcoat

Been a while since I have posted but I’ve not been idle

I started out with a simple waistcoat, once you get to grips with the huge size of the pattern and trying to understand the word used the rest is easy.

Well not easy.

1. At one point in my life I have worked with complex equations, strings of numbers and letters and very detailed blueprints of glass with less than one Millimetres tolerance but nothing NOTHING has baffled me as much as this sewing pattern.

2. Size. I’m a big lad a little on the chubby side but not much, there is just a lot of me so I cut out the XXL size I’m fine with that, what I’m not fine with is the sheer size of the pattern I am using, it’s huge bits of paper all over the place in an already cramped room.

3. Pinning is the bane of my life because you have to pin, if I learn nothing from this but pin pin and pin again it’s a good lesson. I’m not intending to give sewing tip as I know bugger all but I will say pin the pattern to the fabric you want to cut with the same attachment that a teenage girl has to her phone.

So…

As previously mentioned we use Freecycle and we collected a big bag of fabric a few weeks ago so sorting it out I decided on the fabric and set to work.

It took a good few hours to cut it out but perseverance took hold and I got there.

Judge the results for yourself.

I’m proud of it.

But I didn’t stop there oh no.

I am hoping to set up a market stall along with my etsy shop, so I am in the process of making a few more waistcoats, but I have learned my lesson about making them all my size as I want each and everyone I finish. So I am making things I can’t physically fit in.

But I do like this one.

I also made my shirt finally, took some time but I am rather impressed with the results if I do say so myself.

So all in all I’m a happy man.

Crowd funding and compost.

Interesting week this week, been a little warm.

I volunteered to help the other half to shift a few bag of compost from Homebase to her work in central London (you couldn’t get much more central if you tried)

So I toddle off to Homebase and get 25 bags of compost.

That’s right 25 bags.

Did I mention they were big bags?

Bloody big bags!

This was on the hottest day of the year, so we load up the van, and drive to central London not really the place you want to be in a hot van approaching rush hour.

But we got there eventually.

So we unloaded and proceeded to carry the bags up a very narrow spiral staircase and dump them in a huge planter. So we empty eight into the planter. I looked like I had been buried.

So a good deed almost killed me.

But in other news I’ve started a crowd funding project, it’s getting men to sew.

http://www.crowdfunder.co.uk/market-stall-and-free-sewing-workshop-for-men-

Now I don’t want to say much about it here I would rather let the project speak for itself.

But if anyone does feel like it could you please re-tweet or even pledge a few quid.

Etsy, a minefield to idiots like me.

Tags

bunting, catnip, etsy, fabric, market, photos, sewing, shop

Photography has never been my strong point alas

As you can tell, this is just a demonstration of how bad my pictures can be. When I was living in LA I thought I would take a photo of one of the many parrot that fly about, so sat on my roof, camera in hand clicking away like I’m a professional and completely missed the Eagle thats landed and is sat directly above the parrot I was taking a picture of, you can see part of it just not the important parts.

Why this odd conversion about parrots on a sewing blog?

Good question.

I took the plunge over the weekend and set up and opened an etsy shop selling my bunting and mice, now I’m never one to blow my own trumpet I don’t even own a trumpet let alone have cause to blow down it in triumphant glory. But I think the things I make are good, more importantly the other half lets me put them on her stall and she has serious quality control procedures in place.

Imagine if you will the most hard hearted drill instructor who has an almost psychotic obsession with neatness*

* This neatness only manifests itself on the stall

Bundled into a very sweet very pretty woman who can spot a loose thread at 300 yards, a catnip mouse pointing in the wrong direction at a quarter mile and if I make the error of putting one of her cushions upside down on the stall I could see the smoke signals of anger rising from over the horizon (I hid under a table)

So it’s stringent and she is happy to let my meagre offering onto her stall, we have done some large festivals and markets in central London and your makings have to be good.

I’m proud of what I make so I spent hours setting up etsy and PayPal linking my bank accounts and taking photos.

This is where it went wrong.

As previously mentioned I can’t use a camera but I thought it was ok.

Now I learned this weekend that there is a world of difference between what I think is ok and what the other half thinks is ok.

This is a picture my son drew of me, I love it, each time I see it I smile and have happy thoughts, but I am the first to admit it isn’t the greatest if you are talking from an artistic point of view, that’s how I feel about my etsy shop. A child playing in the adult world.

I have had reasonable success on the stalls selling what I make so thought I would turn the shop on and sit back letting the orders flow in looking like the cat who got the cream.

Ye right.

I look and feel like the cat who got neutered.

35 views.

35!

I was expecting some kind of triumphal possession through the living room as the orders clog my inbox and the post office need to take on more staff to cope with my level of postage.

But 35 views!

And the worst of it?

That smug ‘I told you so look’ but she will help me over the week to put it right but what retribution she will ask for is anyones guess.

I almost ordered a catnip mouse from my own etsy shop just to make me feel better.

But the truth is the photos make the shop.

Unfortunately owning a camera doesn’t make you into a photographer.

Take a look.

Don’t laugh!

Plus I’ve still not cut the shirt out.

http://etsy.me/1rkGpaR